Month: February 2021

Although I agree with Konnikova up to a point, I cannot accept her overriding assumption that interpersonal relationships cannot be developed over a virtual platform.

My thesis statement does present a clear argument, stating what my essay is going to be about, and the side I am choosing to argue as well. This thesis is written in a present voice, but I feel as if the language can be more specific rather than being this general. In order to strengthen my thesis, I can also use Chen and clearly state her opinion as I have Konnikova’s to bring in the other side of the argument and strengthen the thesis further. I can do this by creating another sentence stating that Chen claims interpersonal relationships can be developed over virtual platforms, and from there relate my evidence back to that statement to help prove my argument further. 

Phelps-Roper’s communication with C.G. was strictly online, yet she was still able to develop a relationship with him. This argues Konnikova’s point in which Dunbar claims strictly virtual interactions will stunt social interactions. He continues, saying that touch is necessary to form intimate relationships, as it creates shared experiences between two people. In my personal experience, I have been able to form close bonds with people strictly through social media. Social media allows me to have one-on-one conversations with someone, just like I would in person, and no physical touch or interaction will change the atmosphere I have when I talk to someone over a social media platform. Here, many people would object that touch and in-person socialization creates intimate relationships. I would argue this point by giving the example of my friend Will. I had someone named Will add me on Snapchat last year. Will Snapchatted me, and we soon ended up growing a very good friendship. This soon turned into calling each other every night and creating small talk like how our day was or deep and meaningful conversation like what our dreams and aspirations are. To this day I still have not met Will in person, but it does not stop us from having a very personal connection. Although I do agree with Dunbar and his different levels of friendship within the Dunbar number, and I do think touch can help grow a relationship, I do not think it is necessary to have to have physical touch in order to form deep bonds, or that it will stun social interactions. 

Peer review was something I did in highschool to help revise and edit papers before they were submitted. Peer editing was always something I did not enjoy as I felt like it was a burden and it was meaningless. My experience with it was not a good one because many of the corrections I got were all about grammar and punctuation, nothing in depth, making it hard to revise my essays with much detail and thought. Revising just the surface details of the essay was seen as easy and most revisions were on the surface so revisions could be done as quickly as possible. I also dreaded revisions because I too did not like having to rip apart someone’s writing as it was tedious and I did not want to hurt their feelings by telling them what they needed to fix. 

Peer review was not always bad, there were several highlights that did come about it. When reading other people’s writing, I always got ideas for my own writing and how I could improve my pieces with ideas from someone else. Also, by picking apart someone else’s writing, It helped me improve my writing by looking at revisions I made in someone else’s writing and how I could apply them to my own. Peer revisions are considered a two-way street because both partners need to make corrections on each other’s paper, and from there take those corrections and apply them to ultimately better their writing. If one partner does not complete the revisions, it does not work well as the other partner has no feedback to go and revise their writing with. Although it can be tedious and have many conflicts if not done properly, peer revisions can be beneficial to bettering one’s writing.

1. Megan Phelps-Roper is a young woman who grew up within the Westboro Baptist Church. She grew up picketing gay mens funerals that had “God hates fags” (Chen 2) written on them, and she was told that anyone who disobeyed God or gave “place to rebellious thoughts was the first step down the path toward Hell (Chen 5). Growing up in the Church and having these ideals were seen as normal to Phelps-Roper, and anyone who went against them, she was told, was evil. She created a Twitter page to explain all that Westboro believes in, and she soon gained a lot of attention from followers to people messaging her. She becomes close with this one Jewish man, Abitbol, who has plenty of light-hearted conversations with Phelps-Roper about Westboro beliefs and how they affected other people. Along with Abitbol, she starts messaging a man with the name of C.G. and soon becomes romantically interested in him, going against Westboro ideals. It is while conversing with C.G. that Phelps-Roper starts to question the Church and realize there is more to life than being scared one will “feel God’s wrath” (Chen 15). After months of being treated improperly by the Church, she convinces her sister to move out and escape the life of the Church. Here, she grows public with her identity and her experiences being in Westboro. This allowed people to forgive her and understand her story, along with her feeling secure in the fact that God will no longer hurt her for her sins.

2. Social media emboldened Phelps-Roper’s initial message as a spokesperson for Westboro Baptist Church because she was able to hide anonymously behind a screen. She could have conversations with strangers about Westboro beliefs, and post her opinion on something without receiving personal backlash due to the fact that she was anonymous. Chen states, “@F_K_A told Phelps-Roper to call him C.G. But C.G. remained a mystery”(Chen 11). Here, Chen gives an example of how the people Phelps-Roper was conversing with stayed anonymous and kept his identity secretive. Not only were the other people she was conversing with anonymous, but she was too.. It was not until after she escaped the Church that she decided to become public with her story and allow everyone to know her identity. According to Chen, “after so many years at the public face of Westboro, she wanted to go public with how she’d left the church, and to start making amends for the hurt she has caused”(Chen 15). Here she implies that she has hurt people, and by going public she wants people to understand that she did hurt them and she apologizes for it. Without her initial message over social media, Westboro would not be as known as it is today, yet, still a small hate driven, cult church.

3. Phelps-Roper reacted differently to being confronted because it came from someone she trusted and genuinely enjoyed being around, causing her belief system to be influenced. Regular people would become upset with Westboro’s ideals and immediately think to threaten them by using vulgar language and violence, which one would normally be scared of and convert due to fear. Phelps-Roper was different in the sense that she never took any of the threats seriously in that she was always singing and dancing during protests. It was not until she met a man and became romantically interested in him that she became confused by her ideals. She was so invested in him that he was able to open her eyes to the idea that she was part of a cult, and that she was hurting other people by rejoicing tragedies. He never grew angry or harsh towards her, but always used a light-hearted tone and polite language with her. This allowed her to trust C.G. and let her guard down, making her vulnerable to his conversions. Her story explains that when confronting hate speech, one must not explode with emotions, but use a gentle, easy-going mood as it creates vulnerability. Meanwhile, redemption allowed Phelps-Roper to understand she was in denial and allowed the people she had hurt to forgive her and let her grow. 
4. When you were young and fully immersed in the ideals of Westboro, did you ever, at any time you were in the Church or picketing feel as if it was wrong to be rejoicing dead people, or feel as if it was okay to support 9/11 or AIDS or any sort of destruction among the world? Did you ever think any destruction was not created by God, but something else?

Before:

There are many traits that factor into a good friendship, including loyalty, respect, trust, compassion, and honesty. Within Konnikova’s essay, the ideas of growth, learning, and friendship are portrayed, and no matter how close the intimacy of friends, growth and learning should be acknowledged in friendship. In order to learn from your mistakes, one has to be honest with themselves and their friends. Learning how to get along with someone and cooperate with someone takes compassion, respect, and trust. When Konnikova states “So what happens if you’re raised from a young age to see virtual interactions as akin to physical ones?” (259), she questions the difference between social interactions and virtual interactions. Today’s younger generations have grown up with cell phones, computers, and other advanced technology, and have not had the face-to-face interactions older generations have. Because of this, thoughts of younger generations and future generations being less social because they have less intimate relationships is being pondered. It is imperative children learn to cooperate and trust one another at a young age, because many traits learned as children cannot be learned as adults.

After:

Many characteristics factor into a strong friendship, including loyalty, respect, trust, compassion, and honesty. Within Konnikova’s essay, the idea of growth, insight, and companionship are referenced, and the idea that growth and development should be acknowledged within a friendship. Honesty is crucial to the development of a friendship, as one has to be honest with themselves before they can be honest with someone else. One simply cannot be honest with a companion if they are not honest with themselves, it creates strain on relationships and can cause difficulties with intimacy in the future. Having healthy relationships with someone takes cooperation, as growth is not inherited, but learned. Being able to get along with someone takes levels of compassion, respect, trust, and compromise. Konnikova created the idea that relationships are learned from environments, not inherited: “So what happens if you’re raised from a young age to see virtual interactions as akin to physical ones?” (259). By her stating this, she introduces the idea that virtual interactions can not compare to those of in person. Here, she continues on to say in person interactions have a sense of intimacy as you can see facial expressions, body language, and touch. Younger generations have grown up with immense amounts of technology around them, leading them to not have the face-to-face social interactions older generations have the experience of. This causes younger generations and future generations to become less social because they do not have the experience of intimate connections. It is imperative for children to learn how to socialize at a young age, because once grown it is harder for humans to learn traits compared to when they were kids. This is supported by Konnikova’s idea that friendship is learned, not inherited. 

Within my revisions, to add specificity, I included more in depth analysis of certain topics to enhance the reader’s understanding of the point I am trying to make. Because of this added detail, my paragraph did increase in length by a few sentences, but it provides clarity to my ideas. I also changed word choice to sound more descriptive and include more detail within my writing. These adjustments did not impact my paragraph length, but did grab the reader’s attention more. I rearranged sentence structure, and moved them around the paragraph so they could hold more clarity and meaning about the essay, along with adding a stronger analysis so the paragraph flowed nicer while still keeping the specificity of the paragraph. By making these changes, I have a better and more coherent paragraph, allowing optimal understanding for my audience.