1. “Although I agree with Konnikova up to a point, I cannot accept her overriding assumption that interpersonal relationships cannot be developed over a virtual platform as Chen argues”. This revised thesis provides strength as it includes both Konnikova and Chen’s points of argument. This creates a clear idea and understanding of what the rest of my essay will entail and the points I will further make. Although this is a strong claim, it could be made even stronger if I went more in depth into the ideas that both Chen and Konnikova are arguing instead of just listing that they have opposing views. This would have allowed for a stronger understanding of the essay as a whole and further dive into details.
  2. I learned that writing my thesis before I start writing my rough draft, but during the outline may not be beneficial to my writing. Usually when writing essays, I create my thesis before I start writing, but throughout this essay I realized that sometimes I need to get my thoughts on the paper before I can pinpoint where I want to focus my energy within the essay. I did, however still create an outline, but just focused on key details I wanted to include in my paragraphs, for example including the Dunbar number in one paragraph and personal experience in another. This reminded me of my own writing process because I do create outlines before I write so I can have a clear organized thought process and make sure I include the details I want within my essay.
  3. I used global revision to further deepen my understanding of the texts and to ensure that every point that I have made is strong and clear. By doing this, I really deepened my analysis of the texts and provided clarity to the topic. I also brought in personal experience to help relate this to real-world situations and create a stronger understanding of what I am trying to convey to the audience. Changes or adjustments I made to my essay included further analysis and expanding my ideas within a specific topic. I feel as though I covered mainly surface details, but in order to maximize my full potential, I had to carefully look at each individual thought and expand my ideas from those thoughts.
  4. I would approach essay #2 in a similar way as I did essay #1 as far as annotating the text and creating an outline and a rough draft. I feel as though I could have spent more time revising and further analyzing my details within essay #1, and I want to apply this to essay #2. I think focusing more on revisions within essay #2 and maybe meeting with Elena again to go over multiple revisions of my essay would be beneficial. I like the way I approach the assignment by really taking my time and analyzing the texts, and then from there reading the prompt and creating an outline of what I want to write about, and certain details each paragraph can include. Something else I can use to my advantage is going to SASC and having tutors there look over my essay and help me expand my ideas and revise my essay for a strong final draft.